It's all true

Revealed! My secret plot to make the leader of the free world look like an incompetent, drooling baboon:

So now my guilty secret is out, tell me: is it working? Are all those impromptu witticisms and downhome cowboy references I've been slipping into his speaking notes for years starting to have an effect?

(P.S. Gary Turner is an evil, wicked man. And a very talented one.)