The Quicker Deforestator
A few months back, can't remember how or why, I came across this FAQ at the Bounty website:
7) Are Bounty paper towels made from recycled material?
No. Bounty paper towels are made from virgin wood pulp.
I remember thinking at the time - WTF? What the hell kind of dumbass upside-down value set does this kind of proud claim reveal?
Remember: this is a product purpose-designed to wipe shit up. REALLY important that it's made from only the finest virgin wood pulp then, right?
Unfortunately, I forgot to mention this stupidness to the Sausage, and the other night she came home from the grocery store with a six-pack of the damn stuff, at which point I promptly kicked myself.
But it's stupider than I thought. When you open the outer plastic wrapper on this thing to get one of the rolls of towel out - get this: each of the suckers is individually plastic wrapped.
What the hell for? What possible purpose can this serve?
I'm serious - this is not just a regular garden variety Michael rant: I'm genuinely perplexed. If you have any idea about this, I'd really like to know.
Why in the name of arse do they think they need to go to the pain and expense of individually sealing something you're going to use to wipe peanut butter off the floor?
Not satisifed with just the virgin wood pulp bit; is this some kind of additional gratuitous middle finger P&G is flipping at reasonable environmentalists everywhere?
